Providing comfort to the dying

STERLING — It’s never easy saying goodbye to someone you love, but hospice can help make it a little more bearable.

Mary Stewart-Glover, of Sterling, has relied upon Hospice of the Plains twice, last year when her mother, Gloria Stewart, died of COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease) and congestive heart failure, and five years ago when her husband, Danny Glover, died of rectal cancer.

“Everybody thinks (hospice is a place), it’s something that helps you do what you want to do at the end of your life and that is to live out the rest of your days at home, with your family,” Stewart-Glover said.

She first became familiar with hospice when her husband was diagnosed with rectal cancer in June of 2009.

“He always said a colonoscopy was the stupidest thing he never did,” Stewart-Glover said, recalling how much her husband wished he would have done one, because he could have found out he was sick sooner.

Her husband spent almost a year in hospice, until he passed away on Feb. 17, 2010, at the age of 59.

“Danny was amazed with all the stuff hospice did,” Stewart-Glover said.

They helped not only her husband, but Mary and their son, Connor, as well.

Some of the things Stewart-Glover said she appreciated the most was their help with the heavy narcotics that those on hospice are often taking and the healing touch treatments, or massage human touch therapy, they provided, not only for Danny, but for her as well.

The flowers she received were also appreciated. According to Tammy Futch, office manager for the Sterling Hospice of the Plains office, local florists have been delivering flowers every Friday for the last 10-plus years, to be donated to hospice’s in-town patients.

Stewart-Glover recalled one of the more difficult times for her, when her husband fell out of bed and she couldn’t get him back in bed, so she had to call the hospice nurses to her house at 4:30 a.m. But hospice was there: one of the nurses came over and helped her get him back into bed and then offered to watch her husband while she went and got a cup of coffee or something, just to get out of the house for awhile, something those with dying loved ones don’t often get to do.

“Hospice was there for anything I needed,” Stewart-Glover said.

After the support she received from hospice when her husband way dying, when her mother became ill last year Stewart-Glover knew exactly where to turn. Her mother was on hospice for around a month, until she passed away March 18, 2014, at the age of 81.

One of the things her mother was concerned about when she spoke to her about going on hospice was how much it would cost. But, as she pointed out to her mother, it’s covered by insurance, including Medicare and Medicaid.

“Nobody wants to die in a hospital, alone. This way they can stay at home,” Steward-Glover said.

Other organizations often join to help hospice with patients’ needs as well, including Northeast Colorado Cancer Resource Association.

“The community becomes part of the team sometimes,” said Deb Neal, a chaplain with hospice.

When Stewart-Glover’s husband became ill they didn’t have any insurance or wills written up, so hospice got an attorney to come over to their house to help them set up wills and do some estate planning.

“It’s a scary time, even if you’re financially able, even if you have all your ducks in a row, you don’t know what to expect and hospice helps you to understand the process of dying and grieving,” she said.

“We like to think we help people to not be so afraid at the end,” Futch said.

She pointed out that a lot of people think hospice is only for older people, but they care for people of all ages, even children sometimes, and many people think it’s mostly people who have cancer that use it, but people with all types of illnesses can use it; it’s end of life care.

Stewart-Glover noted that the hospice team “will help you as much as you let them.” It’s really up to the patient and their family. If you’re willing to do certain things like healing touch treatments, then hospice will do them, but if you don’t want that they won’t force it on you.

“We don’t take over your life,” Futch said.

“The patient and family are totally in control until the last breath and the care is patient and family driven,” Neal added.

Those who want to show their support for hospice will have the opportunity when the Elks Lodge presents its 13th annual Hospice of the Plains Hog Roast and Auction Saturday, Feb. 7.

“I hope a lot of people come out to the auction and support it,” Stewart-Glover said.

Serving will take place from 4:30 to 7 p.m. and the auction will start at 5:30 p.m. sharp. There will be a variety of items in this year’s auction, including recliners donated by Ollijurt’s Enterprises LLC and Bedford Furniture, a Broncos ice cooler, toys, gift baskets and several handmade items.

Futch thanked the community for all their support over the years, noting it’s not just businesses that donate to the auction, but individuals as well.

Cost for the hog roast and auction is $7 in advance or $8 at the door. Tickets can be purchased at the Elks Lodge, 522-0515, or at Hospice of the Plains, 526-7901.

There is also another event coming up to support hospice. Northeastern Junior College’s cosmetology department is inviting guests to “Look Like a Star” for Valentine’s Day as part of a celebration with hospice from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m., Friday, Feb. 13. A portion of all profits made of the day will be donated to Hospice of the Plains.

Students will also be making some community education and information about hospice available to the public on this day.

Call 970-521-6733 to make an appointment.

For those who have lost a loved and need help dealing with it, hospice has an upcoming Grief Support Group. The group is free to the public and will be facilitated by Deb Neal and Terry Covert, death and grief studies certified chaplains with Hospice of the Plains.

The group will meet 6:30 to 8 p.m., Tuesdays, Feb. 10 through March 24, at the Hospice of the Plains Office, located at 100 Broadway, Suite 1-A.

There is limited space so those interested need to register by Feb. 4 by calling Neal at 526-7901.

Callie Jones: 970-526-9286, cjones@journal-advocate.com